These Three Messages Guarantee She’ll Reply: What To Say In First Emails

In case you’re new to online dating, the best way to get laid is for you to initiate communication. That’s not to say women online won’t ever make the first move, but you’ll have more success if you’re the aggressor. Communication typically starts with an email message. In that message, it’s up to you to convey to her why she should even bother chatting with you. In order to accomplish that, you need to write a catchy, creative email. Getting her attention instantly is crucial. If you don’t, she will write you off instantly.

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We tried more than 20 different emails. Most of them were complete failures. But we were able to come up with 3 that were well responded to by women. And we’ve since stuck with those 3 emails when initiating contact with women. Those 3 emails are listed below. Please note that these are merely generic templates we use. We personalize each message so they don’t appear canned. Here are the 3 most effective casual sex dating emails we tried…

Email #1

Subject: Three reasons you need to respond to this email…

Body:1.)We both live in Miami. 2.)We both listen to heavy metal. 3.)I’m mesmerized by your baby blue eyes. There are other reasons we need to chat ASAP, but we can go over those once you hit me up. So please take a look at my profile and once you decide you’re interested in me, let’s chat via Instant Messenger. I’ll be free tomorrow evening. Will that work for you? Can’t wait to hear from you!

Email #2

Subject: How many guys today have shown you their penis?

Body: I’m going to break the trend of perverted guys that don’t know how to introduce themselves to a pretty lady. So here’s my introductory email – no pictures of my junk, no comments about how badly I want to give it to you doggystyle, and no misspelled words! At this point, you’re probably thinking, “is he really a dude or is he a female posing as a man?”. I promise you I’m actually a guy, and although I’m only looking for a casual sex relationship, I’m far from a disgusting pervert. So if you want to chat with a man that knows how to please AND respect a pretty lady such as yourself, hit me up on IM. Look forward to hearing from you!

Email #3

Subject: I’m free this weekend…

Body: I didn’t sign-up for this site to go back and forth emailing people. And I’m sure you didn’t either. So let’s get to know each other through Instant Message and maybe we can go grab a drink this weekend. I’m not going to go into detail about myself (you’re going to view my profile anyway!), but I did want to make it clear that I’m very attracted to you and your profile made me chuckle! You’ve got a great a sense of humor and that line about your crazy ex made me spit my Jack and Coke all over my computer screen! Which reminds me…you owe me a new computer! I tell you what, you can pay me back by going out for some drinks with me on Friday night. How’s that sound?

And now an example of an email that didn’t work so well…

Subject: Damn, girl you’re SEXY!

Body: I don’t have any cheesy clichés to write you but I will say that you have one hell of a nice ass! I’d give anything to get a piece of that! Oh, and your smile is nice too. I’ll be brutally honest with you, you’re a perfect 10. You’re the hottest babe on this site and I want to get to know you better. What do you say we meet up for some drinks this weekend? Friday, Saturday, and Sunday are open for me. So whenever you’re free, I’m down. And if you’re lucky I’ll let you get up on top of me later!

Why The First 3 Emails Worked, And The 4th One Didn’t

Before I explain why the first 3 emails were more successful, let’s go over the components of a good introductory email…

  • Catchy subject line to get her to open the email
  • Catchy introduction to hook her in
  • Personalized message
  • No misspellings and/or improper grammar
  • Mildly humorous content
  • Classy, not perverted
  • Doesn’t make you appear desperate
  • Doesn’t get carried away with compliments about her appearance

The first 3 emails met all of the above criteria. They were not perverted at all. The 3rdone was mildly perverted (commenting on her “nice ass”) and we got a bit carried away with the compliments. Women love being complimented, but your email shouldn’t be filled with compliments. That’s what most guys do. Women actually don’t enjoy a man complimenting her looks as much as you think. They’d prefer you compliment her style (attire) and things she says and does.

Another mistake we made in the 4th email was that we appeared desperate. At the end, by saying we’re available on her schedule, that makes it seem like we have nothing else going on – we’re always free. That sounds like a desperate guy with too much time on his hands. The final mistake we made was the subject line. It was unoriginal. And, quite frankly, most women probably never even opened that email. We didn’t give them any reason to. Overall, it was an uncreative email and we aren’t surprised no one ever responded to it.

The other 3 emails above were very effective. In fact, they received more than an 80% response rate. So go ahead and copy and paste those but remember to personalize them. Just go to her profile, read through it, and switch some of the personal comments we made to match the profile of the girl you’re interested in. Knowing what to say to women on casual dating sites is the main key to getting laid. It all starts with the very first email you send to her. So make it a good one!