Drunk Texts That Actually Help Your Cause

I’m sure you’ve been told to never drunk text a girl you want to hookup with. Normally, I would agree with that. But I’ve also learned that it’s possible to use my drunkness to my advantage when texting a girl. In fact, I’ve done this on many occasions and had great success.

Before I give examples of good drunk texts, I must caution you…

Drunk texting is risky. I won’t lie to you. When you’re intoxicated, your mind isn’t working properly. You start to ramble on about pure nonsense. And it’s hard to prevent from doing that because, well…you’re drunk. So before you go out drinking, make sure you tell yourself that you will NOT send any of the following types of texts to your girl

    • “I’m horny, come blow me”
    • “You want me to come over and put it in your ass?”
    • “This ho just gave me a blowjob in the back of my truck”
    • “When you gonna put out?”
    • “Send me a pic of your ass so I can jerkoff to it”
Never drunk text a girl you want to hookup with

Never drunk text a girl you want to hookup with

Try these instead…

    • “I’m bored, drunk, and can’t wait to see you!”
    • “Lots of pretty women at the bar tonight. You’d fit in, so come out!”
    • “Me. You. Drinks. Now?”
    • “I’m thinking about you and how I will please you…”
Lots of pretty women at the bar tonight. You’d fit in, so come out!

Lots of pretty women at the bar tonight. You’d fit in, so come out!

Alcohol builds confidence

Before I go out to a bar or talk to a girl I like, I down a few beers. I don’t get sloppy drunks so I’m incoherent, but for some reason, I feel more confident when I have alcohol in me. The bad text messages above should never be used because they are far too perverted and immature. They’re not creative or interesting. She probably won’t respond to them. And if she does, her response will likely be “don’t ever contact me again”.

Never drunk text a girl you like when you’re sloppy drunk. It’s damn near impossible to text coherently. Only text her when you’re a little wasted. My rule is if I can’t make it home without someone carrying me, I don’t text a chick I want to bang. But I will text her when I’ve had a handful of beers or am slightly above the legal limit. I’m more confident when I’m at that point.

 Sloppy drunk

Sloppy drunk